So apparently a wicket-keeper does at least 210 squats in a 35 over innings. The kind of workout only undertaken by those steroid-enhanced Instagram ‘fitness-influencer’ bellends who always want you to pay for their 30-day sculpt-your-body challenge apps. My hammys are burning. Presumably it gets easier if it’s a regular gig, but I have to work later today and I’m currently not sure if my legs will support my weight.

What a performance though! 3 catches and a (ham-fisted) stumping. Yes, a few byes for sure, but conceded only as a cultured nod to those baroque musicians who purposefully made a couple of mistakes during their performances because perfection was considered an insult to God.

To be honest, the entire Greys team in unison created the sort of cricketing symphony the masters would be proud of on their way to victory at Southwater. A huge opening stand between Biff (69) and Jerry (42) was the foundation. Runs were added by Tim (26no) late on to get the total up to a massive 231. Edwards and Hoare also contributed with the bat, the former perhaps a touch unfortunate to get out to an absolute worldy catch by a Southwater youngster at longish-off, the latter perhaps fortunate not to show his entire bum-crack whilst being stumped going arse-over-tit after swinging (and missing) wildly at a moon ball (yes yes yes, I also got out doing the same thing, I know…). There were too many boundaries to mention so the editor will include the PSM list at the bottom of this report. Fantastic to see Biff playing so well this year and also to see Jerry out in the middle again.

If anything, I think the bowling performance was even better than the batting. The opening spell from Stu C and Tim was an incredible display of swing bowling – Tim getting the early wicket with a tickle down leg-side caught gracefully by the stand-in wicket-keeper (PSM). Stu eventually got the reward he deserved but not until his second spell at the death. Chief bowled great lengths throughout an impressive spell and Terry and Ben took 2 and 3 wickets a piece with fuller deliveries to batters that were, at that stage, having a big ol’ mow at most things. Southwater, despite some very impressive hitting by their younger members, fell short of the target by 40 ish. 

One of those great days where everyone in the team contributes to the win (I remember Alex making an incredible one-handed stop at point which should have been nommed as well!). Lovely opposition too. Good game, good game!

Right, ice-bath for me. After that i’ll be setting up the Greys Instagram account. Subscribe to our 30-day sculpt-your-beer-belly challenge app coming soon!

Statto’s report
Well, well, well 3 catches by the keeper – Dom’s newfound speciality whips him to the top of the catching. In a game of seasons personal bests Biff’s great season with the bat continues as he posts his highest score for the season (69). Tim’s seasons best (3-20) lifts him above Diamond to 2nd place in the bowling.
In the lifetimes not a lot to report – QB’s brace today means he’s 2 away from 300 career wickets, other than that I can’t see anything of note…next week bucolic shenanigans, it’s Bodle Street…