Positively Bodle Street. 

Ooh! … a Bob Dylan-themed report? No. (I reserve that for future use though.) There has been a lot of water under the bridge since 16^th June. A General Election on 4^th July, the final of the  Euros on14^th July, and the Olympic Games 26^th July- 11^th Aug, which will be a distant memory by the time you read this.   

I know, … I could do a loose thing around coming an honourable  second – a British speciality for over 120 years, since poor old Captain Robert Falcon Scott was beaten by superior technology, tactics and training in the race to the South Pole. It will be a bit thin but now I’ve started I feel better. I’ll definitely finish it tonight. I’ll just get another glass of Aldi red. Oh No, I’m doing one of those self-pitying meta-narrative reports that Dom always does. Shit, snap out of it! 

So we’ve had a Labour landslide and a not so honourable second for Sunak and his band of swivel-eyed bastards.  England were well-beaten by Spain in Berlin (Do you know what? I can’t actually remember the score!). Katrina Thompson & Thomson finally got a jolly old silver medal in the Hepatitisathon.  I could go on but the point is this Summer of ‘running-up’ began with Dave Day grimacing* his way down the final straight of our epic long-distance race to 400 lifetime wickets for the Greys. This Battle for the Ages between a finely-chiselled, smarmy poshboy and a scruffy, stumpy guttersnipe (you decide) finally ended two weeks earlier when Dave took 2 for 28 at Goring – an event slightly over-shadowed that day by an exciting last-ball finish. 

No such distractions two weeks later as I came puffing and groaning into view. It was the first decent weather of the season and spirits were high. It was Bodle St after all, where traditionally it is acceptable to take the field as pissed as you want. Not wanting to break another tradition, called Bodle Time, some players arrived ridiculously late – long after the proposed start time. It was Greysmen, Terry and Jerry, who’d have thought?? 

As it seemed to me the game was played in a cheerful spirit and did not last very long. I’ll check the scorebook at this point. I was right. The TMG’s were bowled out in the 30^th and final over for 143.  Toodle Laing opened the batting and scored 65 but only Roberto H reached double figures with him. There were five batsmen bowled out. As I write this, I remember being told that the pitch/wicket had been re-laid and this was Bodle Street’s first game on it. Perhaps they should have been prepared for what came next. Thai Curry? No! I meant their complete failure to adapt their batting to the circumstances. Actually, it was Thai Curry next with; lovely salad, bread and rice, washed down with a nice bottle of Old Speckled Hen. Fantastic!  

I told you it would be loose. This is the bit where I come second! After facing five balls the opener had seen enough and miscued my loopy delivery to Biff at mid-off. Number 3 waited one ball before swatting and missing to become my 400th Greys wicket and PSM.  This is how it used to be before we climbed out of the unregulated and unruly Sussex pub cricket scene. Batsman after batsman swished with increasingly aggressive intent only to find the ball nestling at the foot of their stumps, the bails lying peacefully on the ground just inches away. In eight overs Bodle Street had thrown away eight wickets. Diamond Dan claimed three and I five. Terry finished them off in the 14th over for 37 all out. Not much of a contest in the end but everybody got a go! Thanks to James Fitz for standing in at short notice and making a great debut, bowling 3 overs for two runs! 

*I’m sure the rest of the guys will join me in wishing Dave a full recovery from his back problem – a small part of me wishes he had taken time off to rest it a bit sooner. For his sake, obviously. 

He doesn’t even like camping.