TMGs vs Balcome September 2013 by Robbie Hoare

Balcombe, sunny, picturesque, lovely.

Toss, won, bat, boo.

Jerry 4, hurrah.

Jerry 6, hurrah, ball lost, boo.

Jerry 6, hurrah.

Jerry 6, hurrah.

Skip bowled, boo.


Guy in, hello.

Jerry bowled too, boo.

Terry in, skip to the loo.

Terry 4, gasp.

Guy 4, heh heh heh,


Guy out, boo.

Alex in.

Alex 4.

Alex out. Alan in.

Alan 4 Grrr

Alan dot Alan dot Alan dot………

Alan out, Dave in ho ho ho.

Dave 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4……

Dave 50, TERRY 50! Terry out.

TMG 195, tea, yummy.


Tall opener swish, old boy block,

Tall opener 4, old boy block,

Tall opener 4,6,4,2,1,4,6,6,6,4, old boy block.

Tall opener 50, old boy 5.

Tall boy high to long on caught, phew.

Ricky off, QB on,

1st ball, old opener caught, hurrah.

3 & 4 partnership building, boo.

Dave back on, #3 caught behind, yessir.

5 knob, doesn’t like Alex, out for a brace, hurrah.

6 black shoes, hello ducky.

4 slaps to longish mid-on,

Rob makes ground,

Caught, PSM, here we go.

7 & 8 not rabbits.

7 & 8 looking dangerous.

7 & 8 picking up the runs.

Last over 2 balls left

2 to win

4, poo.

Beer & banter

Cricket the winner.



Averages 2013 averages-end-of-2013 Balcombe 220913_1 Balcombe 220913_2
match report balcombe 2013



14 responses to “TMGs vs Balcome September 2013 by Robbie Hoare

  1. thanks to Alex for the awesome long range shots Guy (straight bat) and Skip (straight back). Looking forward to these being a standard feature of our matches.

  2. While we waited for Robbie’s abbreviated match report, Tel kindly gave me the run down of what happened, it went like this: “I score a 50 in twenty two balls, possibly the fastest ever by a Mighty Greysman, while Dave Day, in his usual pedestrian way turgidly accumulates the slowest ever 50 at the other end (and from playing only one type of stroke), and our nominated historian for the day, Mr Robert Hoare, usually so timely in his reporting, has nothing to say about it”.

  3. What actually happened was that Dave came out in the 28th over of a 35 overs game, with the score on 113 and seven overs later the score had raced to 195. Dave faced 24 balls, didn’t score off the first three balls then powered his way to 50 from the next 19, including 12 fours. Anyone who has seen Dave bat will no that this was no agricultural slogging (that was reserved for the man at the other end), but forceful, placed shots to all parts of the ground, played on their merits, including one straight back over the bowler’s head to the longest part of the ground. We don’t keep records of these things, but this must be close (at 22 balls, which would be quick even in the IPL) to the fastest ever Greys 50. It was exactly what we needed in the context of the game, and in a partnership of 82 I am amazed to think that I must have made as many as 25 of them. Sportingly and characteristically, Dave pushed a single in the last over so I could get my turgid and pedestrian 50 (first for 5 years).

    I’ve seen some great sport at first hand over the years – my mate Alan going round Pyecombe in 79 with just a six iron for example – but this was right up there and I had the best spot in the house to witness it.

  4. Dave Day, I want to have your children! Please ask Ibu to give them back and hand them over to me.

  5. Agree with everything the shadow says. I see the notes for Robbie’s report, but where is the actual text?

  6. On the question of fastest ever 50s, I think your 50 at W’lid earlier in the summer came from 25 balls, and was in many ways a similar knock, also coming late in the innings when they thought they’d be chasing a lower total. Mr Gallagher’s match report also doesn’t do that innings justice either.
    Would be good to get a definitive answer to fastest ever Greys 50 some day, if any of our stattos can be bothered.
    P.S. You’re right Delboy, Turgid is an Australian dish cleaning product. I think I mean torpid.

  7. I have the definitive answer to the question of the fastest fifty Tel, well, as definitive as our scoring gets anyway. I will bring the top 5 to the AGM. Not too many surprises.

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