TMG versus Warninglid – 16th August 2015 by Ian Sewell

TMG versus Warninglid. 16th August 2015

It’s Now or Never!

(by Ian Sewell and Eduardo Di Capua)

Listen to the match report by clicking the play button below…turn your speakers on!

The full transcript is included below….


“It’s now or never,” I called to Ben,

We needed wickets, desp’rately then,

Next over will be too late,

The ‘Lid are nearing our one-five-eight!

On first sight this score, was to be respected,

Each precious run was , pain-fully collected.

The Warninglid wicket, not fit for cricket,

One ball up here, the next down here! T’was hard!

Openers Jerry and Biff, found the bounce a bit stiff,

Still they hung around, their technique quite sound.

Then in came Old Terry, and made himself merry

Pulling it here, Cutting it, Where??! Off-side!

“It’s now or never,” I called to Ben, …..

We were soon to be treated – to a rave from the grave-y

A sixty run partn’ship from Johnny and Davey

Woodford flat-batting, Double-D text book twatting

Before we knew, One-fifty was due, Good Times!

Long rumbles of timber, No chance for a limber!

Alex, Ben, Al and Chiefy – all going cheaply.

Ibu and I spend a lifetime, wait-in for the right time,

One of the lads, oh, fuck no pads, Biff sighs.

“It’s now or never,” I called to Ben, …..


‘Lid runs did not come lightly, The Greys bowling was spritely.

Wickets were coming, Greysmen were humming,

But with four wickets captured, we became less enraptured

Our luck forlorn, fielders withdrawn, too far!

Nastys ‘n Nesbitt were settled, the Greys getting nettled,

Losing six runs an over, the game nearly over.

Bens bowling in-ducky, completely unlucky,

An edge or a spoon, as high as the moon, to floor!

“It’s now or never,” I called to Ben, ….

In what seemed desperation, Biff turned to rotation,

He made a breakthrough, so then Al did and Dave too.

Our interest was tweak-ed but runs were then leak-ed

Eight runs they need – our hearts did bleed, once more!

So back on comes Sewell, distracted old fool,

His confidence low down, not up for a show-down.

Mongoose was waiting, smash anticipating,

We live and we learn, the worm was to turn, this time!


“It’s now or never,” I called to Ben, …….



 O-o Sewelly Mio, so up trundled Io,

The first ball was carted, time for t’brave-hearted.

The next ball was fuller, bat gave it some muller

The ball was skied, Shado-ow supplied, the catch!

Now Mongoose was on strike, an opponent we all like,

Fortunate to survive, the mis-hit of an off drive.

But he didn’t linger, next ball got the finger!

Not the contact he meant on, ball caught by Fenton, Nine down!

Only two runs required, but now Sewell was inspired

As he gained the crease, it was the perfect release.

All mouths were a-gaping, as the ball started shaping,

Oh Lord above, it took the glove, to slip!

“It’s now or never,” Come hold me tight,

Kiss me, dear Greysmen, be mine tonight!

Tomorrow will be too late,

It’s now or never, my love can’t wait!


Just one Cornetto, Give it to me!

Delicious ice cream of Italy

Da nuts and chocolate dream

Give me Cornetto from Walls Ice Cream!


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8 responses to “TMG versus Warninglid – 16th August 2015 by Ian Sewell

  1. A first for the Greys, a first for any team worldwide I reckon. A new bar set by the the Greysman most likely to.

  2. Worth coming back from France for, i am currently writing “Don’t fuck with the mighty greys” the musical and I may have just found my lead.

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